Sarah's Palin in Comparison to America's Expectations of Leadership

One day after the long awaited first presidential debate of 2008 and its subsequent media analysis, the spectacle has come and gone and the national attention is turned towards the next major political event for the elections - the Vice Presidential debates. There are still sour remnants of the stunningly excruciating CBS interview with Sarah Palin that left even the most tolerant of viewers stinging with shame, embarrassment and fear after witnessing the monumental meltdown of any presidential political candidate known to mankind to date. It’s as though Sarah Palin’s visible insecurity and discomfort in her own skin transferred to the public as we watched her squirm her way through an interview with Katie Couric and it left many of us searching for permission to disregard the interview as a spoof by monitoring Ms. Couric’s professionally controlled journalistic facial expressions. The horror that this exchange was truly unscripted reality television left hearts fatigued from increased pounding beats per minute knowing that Mrs. Palin was not just merely feigning ignorance.

Unlike many other women whose held high level executive posts in politics, Sarah Palin admits she has never been apart of this political class culture. Imagine removing a low income working class citizen with zero global exposure outside of their own general community since birth and suddenly thrusting them into a political spotlight to articulate cures for our global ills. It’s an unfortunate sacrificial maneuver by Republicans to once again shock the nation into action for republican gain.

Women like Condoleezza Rice, Hilary Clinton, Nancy Pelosi, Madelyn Albright and Geraldine Ferraro benefited from growing up in a political environment whether through family associations with the military, parental political involvement, an extensive career in law and/or foreign relations or in general, a longer exposure to the federal landscape of global politics.

With poor judgment being the crux of Obama’s argument against McCain’s inability to run the country, why on earth did the McCain camp legitimize that argument by tapping Palin for the VP’s run? Not only does Palin’s inexperience underline this question of inadequate judgment, but her own words, limited political history and lack of public finesse drives home the point of McCain’s willingness to risk the country’s safety for political gain.

Sarah’s recent media appearance gave the global community an intriguing insight into her lack of mental agility when answering questions that were seemingly intellectually downgraded to match her mental capacities and understanding of her position.
McCain’s camp has decidedly limited Palin’s media exposure and understandably so.


Usually sharp minded, no holds barred political journalists like Sean Hannity, Katie Couric and Charles Gibson’s hard hitting interview style appeared challenged when attempting to lower the rungs of articulation in order to communicate with Sarah Palin. Mind boggling responses given by Ms. Palin borders on what can honestly be
characterized as mild political retardation. For example, the insistence of Ms. Palin to correlate her foreign policy experience to her ability to see Russia from her hometown is at best, illogical. This is not to be insensitive to the legitimate medically diagnosed population of the intellectually challenged, but it is a characterization of how Ms. Palin’s responses during recent media appearances lack depth of knowledge and a vastly simplistic understanding of the United States’ position in the global community and on certain critical issues facing our country. These charges has been recently exemplified during her CBS interview when Couric applied pressure to get a direct response urging Palin to answer with specificity to outline direct examples of McCain pushing for more regulation with respect to the housing crisis. Palin’s response, “I’ll try to find you some and I’ll bring ‘em to ya”( http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RM72M62jAUc ) This sort of dog-ate-my-homework kind of breakdown under pressure should give immediate pause to Americans at large, and at the very least to the McCain to call to question Palin’s abilities to hold her own on any front during this campaign. Most of all, they should seriously reconsider their selection of a running mate.

The hilarity of Ms. Palin’s public persona leads one to question weather her selection is a well thought out grand plan by the Republicans to mastermind another White House takeover? Is she a smoke and mirrors distraction from the political machine’s inner workings that will calculate a scandal to result in a sudden change in government resulting in the appointment of who ever will satisfy the Republican hidden agenda? The obviousness of the disparity of intellect, views, preparedness and history would make one question the logic behind this team choice. The apparent disconnect between McCain and Palin are all too visible that one can’t help but feel the elections are being positioned to go awry.

Can her sudden appearance on the national political stage have something to do with the gold mine of natural resources that sit untapped under the ice of Alaska? Resources that can be used to alleviate America’s energy/gas crisis, implement bio fuel and energy saving initiatives and help this country transition from a dependence on foreign oil?

In some ways, Ms. Palin is poised to attract sympathy and compassion from the average middle American who can identify with small town values and personas which may translate into votes. But in a time when our country is averaging a devastated reputation on the global scale, tolerance for incompetence, unintelligent leadership and supporting a mockery of our government has come to a screeching halt with these critical elections. The American people will refuse to allow our global standing and reputation to be further compromised by electing a bad remix of our current Administration.

Should You Cut Off Contact with people who disrespects you?

Respect is a universal behavioral practice that is expressed differently from culture to culture. It signifies an acknowledgment of one's inalienable rights. This globally prescribed behavior is shown to a person, place or thing considered to have an esteemed position in one's culture/society (The Vatican, for example), a reverenced quality that one offers such as a judgment, an opinion, point of view, level of experience in a particular area or even for merely existing and providing a unique offering such as the Planet Earth.

Human beings are taught the basic concepts of respect as a process of child rearing which then becomes ingrained into our moral values as adults. Rules such as; don't talk back to your elders, don't make fun of people with disabilities or Listen to your older sibling are examples of basic socially acceptable behaviors that is rooted in the foundation of being respectful.

So, a person who continuously decides to treat another person in such a manner that disregards their rights to be acknowledged as an individual member of society with meaningful contributions, is a person who is making a conscious determination of another's worth as they see it. The impact of this behavior to the offended party carries serious short and long term ramifications to one's feelings of self esteem, self worth and image. Being continuously disrespected undermines a person's intelligence and their ability to function competently since reactions to disrespect can range from anxiety, timidity, confrontation, frustration, anger and physical retaliation. All of which will lead to lower performance levels in any life capacity and negative mental and physical health. Some people unfortunately find themselves in difficult circumstances where dealing with disrespectful people is unavoidable and may have to be endured for a time. For instance, difficult scenarios include a boss or co-worker who undermines your authority at work, a spouse who is abusive or a parent who continuously disrespects a child. In these circumstances, strict boundaries should be set to limit the assaults while preparing a plan to remove yourself from the situation. However, the goal is to cut off all contact for self-preservation. Respect begins with an individual commitment to self. A person with a high level of self respect will not tolerate anything less from anyone else no matter what the circumstance. People are aware of society's right and wrong behaviors - ultimately we are the enforcers of which behaviors will be tolerable in our own lives.

Written for Helium.com 8/25/08

Careers: How to protest an unfair performance review

Employees have the right to disagree with their employers. Most don't because they fear the impact or implications that it may have on their future career or relationship with their current employer. People should remember that work is all about business practices and employees have rights and are protected under the law. The first thing is to know your rights as an employee in the workplace. Make sure you read and become intimately familiar with your job's employee handbook. There may be valuable information as to how you can go about disputing or correcting unfair blemishes on your record. The Human Resources (HR) department can explain how the process works, but in some companies the HR department is the tool for management and may not get you anywhere. Determine if you can speak confidentially to HR and if not seek advice from an outside HR entity. The second most important resource for an employee is the Department of Labor website for your state. There are many tips and laws that you should be aware of that employers can and will break if they are not held accountable. Just because you are the employee and are depending on the income from your paycheck to meet certain needs doesn't mean you are in an inferior position to your employer. It is a partnership and you should always approach it as such. You may be replaceable, but you must be respectable at all times. Let them know that you are aware of your rights. Third, all conversations and actions should be done in writing. You have just as much access to your file as your employer does. You can ask to see your file and you can request correspondence that you write to your employer be inserted into your file. If you get an unfair performance review, you can write your comments/explanations about it and have it inserted into your file. Some employers allow you to comment on your review, some reviews are one sided - but you can always write your own rebuttal and have it filed. Lastly, keep it entirely professional. Don't take it personally although it may be difficult to not take a criticism as a personal attack. There are many factors that can play into why you did not receive a stellar review, but you should always maintain your composure. Some employers use their knowledge of business practices and their employees ignorance of it to their advantage. Stay abreast on your industry and don't be afraid to negotiate your career. Ultimately, its your job to do so, not your employer's.

Originally written for Helium.com

The secret to getting married (if the choice of mate doesn't matter)

Do it while you're young and stupid, you won't know what you're doing or why. You'll be living out your socialized identity without respect to who you will become once you are in your right adult mind. Marriage while young and dumb seems to stunt mental growth, so coming into yourself takes longer especially if you decide to have kids. You have to neglect your needs and desires to place the needs of your family first because that's what you been taught, right. Plus you'll have help from your family why? because you'll be young and they'll know that you need the help. Maybe you have to find a job, finish school, want to start your career, but you have to work so you can pay bills and the babysitter and the after school program so you can do your thing - IF you ever get to it since you'll be tired all the time.
Why do you think men want to marry women while they are young - because young girls work so hard to impress and prove how grown they are. They will do what they can to keep their man from looking at other chicks. (almost) Every young girl's dream is to find a man to marry and live happily ever after. Why do you think grown men like messing around with younger chicks? Cause they can mold you and impress you with simple things like jewelry or a weekend trip to the Poconos. They know what you want to hear - cliche messages that the cosmopolitan magazine quiz says he'll say if he really loves you.
The older women get, the more annoying and one dimensional most men become. It becomes harder to find a man with less transparent bullshit and more grown and sexy substance. The one thing I can offer in this regard is to be who you want to attract. If you want confident - then be it. If you want funny, then be it. If you want sexy, then be it, just be sure its really who you are. Everyone can spot a fake. You can't ask for what you cannot offer up and then some. (if you want to earn respect from your mate in most cases).
So there you have it, the secret ladies to getting married is do it while you're young and dumb, before you start thinking beyond what society taught you what being a woman means. There are some women whose goal in life is to get married and have kids - mainly because that's what their families were all about. Some say you are not a true woman unless you have had a child. Everyone has their own ideology about the subject, but single women are blessed with the freedom of choice, movement and happiness to be what we want when we want and no one can tell us different.
Now I'm not saying we don't need or want a man - I am a believer in couple hood and marriage - BUT, speaking in my grown and sexy voice - the longer you stay single, the more wiser your choice in choosing a mate! Live your Life, Be in Love with yourself and who you attract will reflect who you are at your core. Don't waste your time looking for love, spend your time finding yourself. Happy Hunting Ladies!!

originally published 11/5/2005

What's In A Smile

We do things without knowing why we do them like look down when we pass a group of people or lower the tone of our voice as we're getting ready to hang up the phone from a conversation, by the time we reach 'goodbye' our voice is at a full blown whisper. I know there are some smart asses out there that's saying "i don't do that" ok - well I'm not talking about you - but there are folks that know what I'm talking about here.
This brings me to the concept of smiling. We are taught that it is polite to smile. That a smile shows a sign of friendliness or is a disarming mechanism that makes folks more comfortable to be around you. Its a sign that you are easy going or non threatening. Well, do you ever wonder the message that people who don't smile are trying to convey.
I hate it when I walk down the street and guys say to me - you should smile more often, or why don't you smile. I say to that - smile about what, there's nothing funny or nothing to smile about. Smiling put people at ease in an instant, yet not smiling tells folks they should keep their distance or that something is wrong. Do you think people that don't smile are really afraid inside to let people close or to invite people to talk to them. Its their way of creating distance. Or people that don't smile are those that want everyone to know they cannot be messed with and use it as a warning to keep your distance. Or yet again, not smiling is a sign of unhappiness with oneself and life in general. The inability to be lighthearted and can be a recipe for depression or heavy burdensome issues so you stay away.
Smiling can also be deceptive. You can smile and disrespect someone with a smile on your face. You can smile and lure someone in , gain their trust and then stab them in the back - with a smile of course.
So look at a smile carefully. All smiles are not created equally. You can tell when its a heartfelt smile or if its a mask smile. A smile isn't a smile unless you feel it from the heart and see happiness in the eyes. Otherwise the smile is nothing but a learned reaction with little meaning intended. Use your smile wisely and spread happiness intentionally. Smile wide if you feel me!
farewell.

originally published 11/10/2005

Publisher's note: still smiling.

The Power of Will

Sometimes when I'm in a present state of mind I remember that I am in control of my own destiny. I understand that what happens in my life happens because of the choices I made and the motions I put forth comes back to me and as a result I have my own reality.
It kills me when I hear folks complain about their situation as though they had nothing to do with it. As though life is just happening to them without their input. It just doesn't work that way. Even a non response is a response of acquiescence - a silent submission. It is to our detriment to not know this or to ignore this fact.
When ever you get a moment - play with your will power. Watch the kind of power you have over the simple things in your life and then apply that thinking to long term goals. Here's how I play with myself sometimes (nasty - you know who you are!). I create a simple goal like - I won't eat any cheese today. Since I am a cheese lover, this task is not easy to do. It requires me to be conscious of my goal at every eating moment and to honor my own request.
Alot of times we don't honor the goals we set up for ourselves because we think - ah- its only me. I can do it some other time. But we must honor our own thoughts, feelings and goals - because no one else will and when you decide to look up one day and see what progress you have made in your life - its not what or where it could have been if you had only made yourself important enough to do as you say you will do.
So back to my cheese ordeal - my tummy is full of cheese - all kinds, American, Swiss, extra sharp Cheddar, mozzarella, smoked Gouda, blue, brie, Munster - I love it. So when I open my fridge it stares at me waiting for me to pick it up and cut a slice. My usual reaction to this enticement is to take the whole block, a sharp pairing knife and cuddle up on my couch with my cheese until its gone. On this day of will power - i fight against that urge honoring my own request and what usually happens is I make many trips to the fridge to just look at the cheese. I'll eat other things in place of the cheese, but nothing ever seems to satisfy my taste buds and my mind keeps going back to the cheese. Here is where I notice the mind game and exercise my will power - who wins is the interesting part. Sometimes me sometimes not me, but I can't blame the loss to anything other than my lack of will power against myself.
You can play this game with anything and see how you react to your own discipline. Its great mental exercises and it keeps you responsible for your decisions. You never feel short changed, taken advantage of or left out on the stoop of your life if you just learn to take a stand in integrity and do as you say you will do. Your mastery of will power will strengthen over time - its not hard but its not easy. enjoy!

originally published 11/5/05

Editors update: I've controlled my cheese addiction. 7/08 :-)

Looking for love in all the wrong places

This will be a short one - just something I'd like to get off my chest.
I have a long way to go before I feel like I am in a place where I want to settle down and create a family. After some conversations with my friend Dan, who is somewhat in the same place as I - we came to the conclusion that a significant other is only significant if they provide you with the necessary support you need in order to continue doing what you want to do in life.
This came about by me saying that a potential significant of mine will have to be employed and stable (not just financially, but emotionally and spiritually as well), he will have to be able to work towards a lifestyle that is mutually agreed upon. Yet his argument was that it's not about the money, that if a person you grow feelings for happens to be unemployed, but has passion and drive to obtain a goal then they can be worked with.
I don't know about anyone else, but I have passed the stage of supporting a partner through unemployment or carrying the relationship financially because my man is always broke. I think I've been traumatized by being smooched on, taken for granted and used. I'm not by any means looking to get repaid by imposing unrealistic demands on my future men, however I do enjoy a certain level of tradition when it comes to relationships, one of them being a man who feels protective of me and who enjoys taking care of me every now and again.
I'm no miser either, I am a reciprocal lover. I like to show my appreciation in the form of gifts and outings every once in a while and I don't hold my tongue when it comes to praise and an occasional ego stroke. So am I wrong for wanting a semi traditional modern metro sexual to spend time with. I think not! But i tell you, its difficult to find one with a balance of these characteristics. I've found those who were Too metro - they might as well have been Gay. Or too traditional - which kept me looking over my shoulder for the club he would soon pull out to claim me as property.
I just chalk it up to 'its just not time', I'm not ripe for love - so while on my journey down 'doing me my way' road I will only believe that a well balanced man is out there getting his scales just right for our chance meeting. Hopefully by the time someone suitable appears, I'm not so set in my ways that my road becomes 'my way or the highway' - that's very possible too! Talk amongst yourselves...

originally published 11/25/2005:

Editor's Note - my views on love since the initial posting has evolved slightly. If the one I love has suddenly become unemployed, I would be happy to support him through the occasion, whether to help build a business, take a break or fuel a passion (within the limits of our budget and life circumstance of course). But, being habitually unemployed with no attempts to stabilize just won't cut it. period.